Yesterday June 21, 2008

Mathematically calculated, it was supposed to be the happiest day of the year.

Clearly, something went wrong. We both need at least 3 days of cool off. In the meantime, I’ll try and think of something. Even if it’s just to be friends, I guess.

Was pretty depressed today after bad things happened yesterday. Went to Jackson outlets with the family and bought a lot of clothes. And running gear. Also, ordered Spy Optics HS Photochromic sunglasses online a few days ago. Even if other shit goes wrong, I suppose I can fall back on running fast.

Family wants to go on a trip, so i’ll be gone the next four days. (until wednsday at the very least.) Going to a national park in Virginia, then Duke University. I probably need to escape for a while anyway. As long as it doesn’t interfere too much with my running. (Shouldn’t. We’re visiting a goddamn park. There’ll be trails and whatnot.)

27 days left June 12, 2008

yesterday was highly successful. I can’t delve into details (Note to self: check today’s logs), but the trust that was lost beforehand has been at least partially restored. Things are looking up for me, but at the same time, i’m running out of time to make things work out. I’m confident I can do this because too much planning and effort has gone into this for it to fail. I’m putting a lot of things on the line for this. There’s way too much at stake for me to lose.

Dammit Watson! June 11, 2008

Even with the extension, I need to get out of the red zone ASAP. My rep is taking a total dive, and I need to act effectively and quickly. Additionally, I actually feel somewhat responsible and guilty about this. I must have really screwed up 6 months ago in order for you to sink to this level. This is my repentance. Even as a friend and someone that cares even in the slightest, I owe this to you.

Had a guidance appointment today about scheduling. Pissed to find out that Discrete Math was cancelled. Taking AP Psych instead.

I have the sheet music for White Lie, but it’s for the solo version, not the accompaniment for vocals. This being the case, I’ll have to transcribe the music aurally. I’m not that good at this stuff since I don’t have perfect pitch yet, and I usually don’t bother to do things like this. Also, I haven’t tried singing while accompanying on the piano before. But as far as I know, it’s significantly tougher to multitask these things as opposed to doing each one individually. It’s worth it though. If i make a decent video of the performance and include subtitles, I’m pretty sure I can win on the basis that the lyrics are godly and that korean ballads have a decent success rate. Getting up to performance caliber in less than a month will be really tough. But I need this deadline to motivate myself to work harder.

The last day June 10, 2008

It shouldn’t have come to this. I have 2 hours and 15 minutes left as of this writing.

No worries though. I’ve committed to saving you. Hence, I’ve given myself at least a one month extension on the deadline. I’ve been a little passive for someone who was trying to get things done in 11 days. Thus, it seems more appropriate that I make this a long term project. This sort of job deserves some time anyway. As long as I can get the situation out of the red zone, I can really take my time with the rest.

I’m really frustrated by the fact that this job would have been so much easier if i had started earlier. Even 3 days earlier would have been significantly better. You don’t have to seriously consider every damn request, you know!

Ultimate frisbee is awesome. 98 degree weather isn’t. But it does make me seem especially hardcore. I believe the exact words that would be appropriate are “physically durable.”

I can’t believe Leo Club managed to fuck up the Brawl tourney. They ended up just giving the 1st place prize money to Steve, which is appropriate since he was probably the best competitor. However, the organization was terrible in that we didn’t fucking finish.

3 days left June 7, 2008

I realized that I can’t give up hope. I’ll at least consider continuing this ordeal, and I’ll come to a decision at the end of these 3 days. At a gathering today, certain things have given me a decent amount of confidence that I can still pull this off. I don’t really have any trump cards left, but things can work out.

This entire week was so crappy, things can only really go up from here.

Haha I ended up spending a good portion of my day w/ Paco because there was this Chinese School luncheon thingy that my mom had me go to. Then I saw her again at Ritchie’s house. Good times. Mom and dad were trying to figure out why I talk to paco so much whereas i don’t really talk that much to any of the other asian girls. I’m not going to delve much into this. There’s probably some sort of man-law in which you can’t spend more than 6 sentences in a row talking about a girl unless you’re plan on making a move. Thus, this is the end of discussion. At the very least, not now.

I’m sure things will get better once I start running again

Crappy Week comes to close with crappy day June 6, 2008

Got a ticket for not stopping completely while making a right turn on a red light.

SAT Physics tmw. I should probably get an 800, but it’s always hard to tell anyway.

4 days left. I probably have to decide whether to abandon the mission or to make it a long term project. It really is something i could be passionate about again, but who the hell knows with all these damn hormones ruining my judgement?

The only good thing that has come out of this week is that I’ve been playing Brawl much better.

I guess life will be better when I start running again. Gives me time to think on my own while also keeping my mind off some of the nuisances in my everyday life. Also helps develop my hot body :p

Started playing White Lie by Lee Seung Gi for the piano. This is the first time in a really long time that i’ve actually sightread a piece and begun to enjoy it. The lyrics of the song are really fitting for my situation, but I can’t imagine that I’ll be able to use it to serenade someone because I can’t sing in Korean. Maybe some hard work over the summer will pay off. (also wanting to learn guitar) In that case, I guess the mission could work in the long run. But I really need to fix this situation before it gets too bad. It’s already really damn bad.

5 days June 5, 2008

One of my worst fears was confirmed today. It’s not too late to get out. I can still save you.

SAT Physics coming up on Saturday. Gotta cram the next 27 hours.

Did not play any rounds in smash tourney today. Quarterfinals, semifinals, and finals postponed to weekend because Yalcin and Jon Liu have senior prom tmw.

Using a new mouse. The Logitech MX Revolution. I like it so far. The scrollwheel feels much better than the one on my old Microsoft Laser 6000. Also very ergonomic.

Started posting on HeyGeeks.com with Sam. Let’s see where this goes. Even if we don’t monetize it, it will be a good opportunity.

XC meeting for the fall was today. I’m going apeshit with mileage this summer.

Smash Tourney cont. June 4, 2008

I won three rounds in the loser’s bracket today, using wolf for almost all of them. I’m feeling more confident that i can play decently with wolf w/o SDing the crap out of myself. I’m playing Jon Liu next round though, so things are gonna be really tough. I’ll have to hold on and see what I can do…

Six days left… I’m not sure how this is going to play out. I can’t give any signs of giving up though. I can’t just bend over and take it like this. I’ve still got six days to figure out something. Otherwise, i guess a long-term victory would have to be acceptable to me.

I haven’t run since spring track ended. The smash tourney has taken up too much time this week. It’s okay though. i probably need to make sure i don’t burn out halfway through XC anyway.

Seven Days Left June 3, 2008

I have a week left. Things were not ideal at all yesterday, but it’s not like things were supposed to be totally easy. I probably would have been successful 3 or 4 days earlier, but unforeseen circumstances have hindered my chances for success. I should probably take a few days to rethink the plan and come up with contingency plans. I’m not giving up on this shit yet. I vehemently refuse, in fact. Life tends to shit on people, doesn’t it?

Smash tourney was pretty crazy. I lost in the first round to a guy named Steve yesterday. He used DDD and i got owned using Diddy and Marth. Steve ended up taking out Jon Liu, so apparently he’s pretty good. In the loser bracket today, I faced some asian froshy and sandbagged w/ wolf to win both matches one-stocking.

Obama just clinched the nomination. About damn time.

Varsity awards were tonight. I had thought Mccaff didn’t letter me last year for spring track. (And I was pissed) As it turns out, i got a second-year letter this year, so apparently he did letter me. Still, this season was relatively disappointing for me. I had the fitness, but I couldn’t put together a good race. I need to get over this damn mental block if I want to help our XC team get to the Foot Locker Nationals this December.

Happy Anniversary June 2, 2008

Happy Anniversary and Happy Mole Day